Of Daughters and Sons

Sangeetha Alwar life, ,

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Found this quote a while back and it for me thinking. How relevant it is in the present circumstances.

Personally, I have come across many girls who are fiercely independent, opinionated and very ambitious. Yes there is a majority that’s completely contrary but this tiny percentage is encouraging.

While girls are now being brought up to be tough and strong, boys of or age get the raw end of the deal. They are still taught to cling on to age old customs and beliefs.

I have talked to guys who still believe that girls must not retort, that crying will somehow make you less of a man. There are some who even hide their emotions deep inside due to the fear of being regarded as “effeminate”. As a result of that I have noticed that they develop insecurity and inferiority complex.

Due to this lack of proper wholesome upbringing, when these kinds of men come across independent women, they are intimidated and feel threatened. I think the major cause of harassment or crimes on women is also a direct result of such problems.

Well the only solution that I see would be to teach kids to be strong yet sensitive at a young age. Discouraging gender stereotypes and encouraging critical thinking in kids would pave the way for a better society.

But herein arises yet another problem, the education system. We are so concerned about our academic outcome that we fail to see that the quality of education is dwindling.

In order to change the education system, we would have to take legislative and administrative (governmental) measures, but for that to happen, we would require intelligent concerned representatives in the government.

Such a transparent government would only exist if the citizens realise that the main concern is the intellectual development of the nation and stop fighting over caste, religion and sex, Which is impossible without quality education.

And so the vicious circle continues! It cannot be broken. There is a glimmer of hope that enlightened individuals might interact with the society, and change the dynamics at the grassroot level, the family unit.

There is always hope.

“The problem is not that we are bringing our girls up to be like boys, it is that we are bringing up our boys to NOT be like girls”.

24 thoughts on “Of Daughters and Sons”

  1. I think the problem is that there is still this divide between boy or girl instead of person. Yes one has a penis and the other a vagina and hormones and the like. Yes they are different but the characteristics we impose on women and men have nothing to with their genitals or their hormones but stem so deeply in our past that we cannot seem to let them go…

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  3. I pray someone from the Parliament gives it a read and shake their senseless skulls to act and improvise now and you wrote so depth ,I absolutely loved it 🙂 God bless Sangeetha 🙂

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  4. It all starts with one person speaking up. And it continues, or rather, it should continue, with the second one taking action. But, is writing enough? Sometimes, I wonder. There are so many bloggers with such great thoughts, but how many of them get heard at the right time by the right people? These are hopes and thoughts worth dwelling upon and I couldn’t agree more that change begins at the grassroot level – our family and the values passed on to us.

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    • I agree. Appreciation of talent and giving it a proper platform is another thing that we must learn.. 🙂

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  5. Sangeetha !! I m sorry for reading it so very late when half the world has read & commented 😀 and the post is so true and yes we can hope for the best that all things will fall in their respective right places 🙂 but if a man cries then I think it should make him proud and peaceful that he is human and he has emotions and not an emotionless robot 😦 I seldom cry and it makes me feel good and gives me strength to go through life !! Thank you again for your time and posting the blog here 😉

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  6. I agree that some men feel threatened and intimidated if they come across an independent woman because they are not taught to see a woman in the dominant position and for that, the society’s point of view have got to change because it’s not the problem of one or two men — it’s the problem of many resulting emotional or physical abuse (as you mentioned).

    -Naima

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  7. I believe the cycle can, and will, be broken …. but we must be patient. Whereas I see no future in progress at a government level, I believe it to be true that most parents bring up their children the same way that they were brought up …… with a few desired changes. It is those desired changes that are our hope for the future. My generation made huge progress in the areas of voicing a desire for peace, and your generation can use your own perspectives to establish standards among your peers and of course any children you may have. You may not see “absolute equality” in your lifetime (my world is still not at peace with itself) but have faith that it will come, and work towards that goal. Have faith.

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      • Faith ….. hope is not that much of a stretch in imagination. The “internet” now makes it very difficult for countries to hide from the rest of the world. What countries got away with 40 years ago (and sooner), are now exposed for world wide condemnation and, while this may not eliminate inequalities in the political spectrum, it must certainly bring some ideologies into question. Things will change!

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  8. //Discouraging gender stereotypes and encouraging critical thinking// now this is what i liked the most. gender stereotypes will lead to have the bad mindset . induce people bashing qualities .
    rather as you said critical thinking , empathy , intelligence, pro-activeness, are all the qualities i would like to see in a growing kid

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